Dear Eric: As adults, I end up picking up the slack just like when we were kids. I also manage all of our bills. She is completely in the dark about how any of our finances work, and my attempts to get her more involved haven’t stuck. In another living situation, she’d be incredibly vulnerable to being taken advantage of, potentially paying more than her fair share simply because she doesn’t know any better.
Dear Eric: We have two nephews, 17 and 21, and felt it was time to teach them money management skills and saving for retirement. At Thanksgiving, we funded two brokerage accounts for each – a $7,000 Roth IRA and $3,000 brokerage. We also gave two books on long-term investing.
Dear Eric: One of my best friends is a woman I introduced to my boyfriend’s brother. They married last October after knowing each other for about six months. My friend often confides in me about what’s happening in the marriage. She is sensitive about her husband’s relationship with his ex-wife and told him that he should only communicate with the ex-wife about their daughter.
Dear Eric: I have a strong desire to travel and visit new places. Is a nomad lifestyle a feasible option at my age, and what should I consider before embarking on such an adventure?
Dear Eric: I’m a woman in my late 40s, juggling a multitude of responsibilities that have left me feeling drained and overwhelmed. At work, I manage several teams and am constantly making high-pressure decisions. At home, I’m a dedicated mother to a tweenager; her father (my ex-husband) is rather uninvolved, placing a significant burden on me for our daughter’s needs. My current husband, while supportive, is embroiled in a contentious custody battle, turning to me for emotional grounding. My elderly parents, while healthy, depend on daily check-ins, which can be emotionally taxing. Even our pets seem to rely on me for comfort.
Q. My ex is not a good person. She sends me terrible text messages that the kids have read over my shoulder. They tell me she refers to me as “sperm donor” when she talks to her friends. (They aren’t sure what that means, but they know it’s bad.) Now the kids are telling me they don’t want to go back to her home. We alternate weeks, and this is a real problem. What’s good ex-etiquette?
Dear Eric: I play in a community orchestra and sit next to a woman who sometimes comes to rehearsal smelling strongly of alcohol.
Q. My ex is impossible. Each time we go back to court, I hope for a different outcome, but nothing is ever changed. No one understands! How do you co-parent with someone you cannot agree with? What’s good ex-etiquette?
Dear Eric: My brother-in-law (never married, age 63) has been financially irresponsible as long as I’ve been married to his brother. He has accumulated tens of thousands of dollars in debts. He currently has no addictions, no mental health issues, but lives with his mother who is aging but continues to pay for his necessities. He gives his money away and people take advantage of him. His parents have always bailed him out and feel like he’s a victim. He has had steady jobs over his lifetime and gone to college – many reasons why he should have savings for retirement.
Q. My ex and I split up six months ago and our children go back and forth between our new homes. We don’t have a formal parenting plan — the split was amicable; we just share the kids every few days. They are 5 and 7. It seems to be working OK, but I have recently met someone new. I am afraid this will complicate things, and their mother will not return the kids when I want them. What’s good ex-etiquette?